The One I Never Loved


I stood helpless as I watched your eyes. I watched as their keen interest changed into confusion and then finally, to pain . You courteously accepted my bitter words, but that’s all it was; courtesy. For even without words, in the air I felt it; accusation.
I wished that there was another way other than hurting you.
Maybe if I could have made you forget that you had ever met me then you’re heart would not ache for what it had never known….if only I could.

What reason did I have not to feel as you did? I just … didn’t. The weight of your emotion stacked against the emptiness of my own was enough to poison your heart against me. Even though it hurt to lose the friend I had in you,Ā  I could do nought but understand. I could not reciprocate your emotion but it does not mean there was something wrong with you. We’re just… different.Ā 

Most people would have ignored that difference and tried to see where things would go but in the end, it wouldn’t pan out as hoped for. I didn’t want to hurt you anymore and trying to ignore the inevitable would be like lying to you. Like betraying you.

We’re on different paths now, probably different people as well. I could never erase what happened but if by any chance our paths happen to meet, I hope you’ll return my slight smile that the unfamiliar moment allows. If you do walk coldly by, I shall walk on with my chin in the air and swallow the tear that threatens to fall.Ā 


5 thoughts on “The One I Never Loved

  1. seshietoast says:

    great to see you’re keeping on… and getting better dear! šŸ™‚

  2. Olive says:

    finally Sesh u resurfaced. Nguti y do i fil lyk ur tokin from experience? **wink**

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