“I knew it from the moment I met you. I had always hated how people would say that and chalked it off as total nonsense. Until it happened to me. I thought I was never going to meet someone I could… connect with. I was going to be the girl who couldn’t commit and I had come to terms with it. Almost, anyway. Then you happened and messed everything up!
I had never felt anything like that before. You were … the guy I had been waiting for and I was insanely happy. For all the two minutes it took before I met her, I was living the dream! Then it turned into a nightmare. You were happy with her. I saw it as clear as day and I knew we were never going to happen. I convinced myself that I had imagined it all; the chemistry. So what if we lived next door to each other?! We could be friends. Neighbourly friends. I didn’t even know you! All I knew was that your smile drove me crazy, your eyes were the most beautiful eyes I’d ever seen.( Yes, beautiful. I know guys hate that but its true! Like a cows eyes.) and you saw me for who I really was.
You would probably end up being an egotistical jerk anyway.
How I wish you had been an egotistical jerk cause then we wouldn’t be where we are today! Why did you have to perfect?? Why couldn’t you have been a disappointment like all the others?? Why? Why? Why did you make me fall in love with you?!
I really wish I hadn’t met you. Because then I wouldn’t be feeling the pain I feel right now. No, I’m not blaming you. How could I? Its not like I’ve been the most upfront about my feelings in the last year that I’ve know you.
All I’m saying is that I’m happy for you -and her. I hope you have a lovely marriage. But please understand that I can’t do this anymore. I’m your best friend and I know I’m hurting you, but understand this.; My staying and watching you start a life with her would kill me. I now how selfish that sounds! Believe me, I do. But this is goodbye.”
Tears had trailed down her flaming cheeks and down her neck to wet the front of her shirt. But she couldn’t take her eyes off him. He sat at the chair behind the desk, his eyes never meeting hers. She knew she’d probably made a huge mess of it all but she had said what she’d come to say.
She picked her coat and bag from the seat in front of her and made for the door.
She heard him stand up and she paused, her hand on the door handle.
She felt her defenses rise and was just about to explode when he said, ” Why didn’t you say this sooner? “