How many times have we heard of a situation where a chic and a dude are best friends while either or both of them are involved in a relationship with another party?!More often than not, I imagine. You, the reader, may even be the one in such a situation. Honestly, that is just venturing down the path that will only lead to unnecessary pain.
One thing my parents have always told me when it comes to marriage is to make sure I marry my best friend. They did. 50 years down the line(25 for Dad, 25 for Mum), they are still going strong. This is not something new, but it is something that is very essential to a healthy relationship.
“More than a friend“- that is one phrase that is really misused. I have been skiaing this song about this dude who knows a chic through a one night stand and now he wants to know her as “more than a friend”.…Dude!!! You just met the chic on some fishy and random one night stand !!!! she is a stranger!!! To be more than a friend, YOU HAVE TO BE HER FRIEND FIRST!!!!!!!
Our generation is really messed up when it comes to relationships because we want things to go chap chap hadi we even skip some stages just as long as we get to reach the finish line. I am sure that among the unions taking place of late, 70% are between strangers!! Guys don’t juana , then they start shtukaing sometime in the marriage and they drop the worst clichés like “I don’t know who you are anymore” ama “You ‘re not the person I fell in love with”
By the way, it’s not that I have a lot experience, or anything like that. In fact, I have never been in a relationship, and I am not in any hurry to do so. I know well enough that, when I get into a relationship, it will be for the long run, which is a lifetime. Si lazima nifanya interview kama Judicial Service Commission .The thing is , the guy was designed to fit that position by God Himself!! Anything else added onto that would be irrelevant and admissible in the court of Law…..:)……just had to.
Friendship sets the foundation on which a relationship is built and it takes time!!! There are no two ways about it. You cannot sit down and just bwaga details about your life to a stranger and decide “now we are friends lets move to the next level!” It is through friendship that you learn to trust wholly. In Kenya, and the world over, you will pata that sometimes a chic and dude hold back information about each other ati for the sake of mystery. What they are actually doing is excluding them from a part of their own life, creating a point of weakness in the foundation!
Then of course, there is the age-old quandary of being in a relationship while having a friend from the opposite sex. That is what you call Emotional Adultery. People, the purpose of getting into a relationship, essentially, is for marriage. I don’t know who distributed the memo that said otherwise. Everything else is just child’s play; two people playing kalongo. I say that because they are only playing around with the idea of being together. They have no clue to how much more it could be.